The Lost Art of Dating

'Do you like me or love me'?
'I like you with all your faults and I think that is love'.

This was taken from the 2nd book in John Marsden's Tomorrow series, In the Dead of the Night.

It's easy to 'love' someone when you haven't seen their faults yet. People are so quick to say that they are in love, when really, a lot of the time it is lust. Lust doesn't always have to be in reference to sex. To me, the word lust can be used to describe a strong desire for some sort of comfort or satisfaction. Someone can lust the feeling of being loved. Someone can even just lust company.

Sometimes, one can fall in love with the feeling of being lusted/loved/admired. It gives them a false sense of completeness and leads them to returning the feeling to the person regardless of their compatibility.

Have you noticed that for a lot of people, they love someone because that person loved them first?
Like in high school, when a girl finds out that the jerk in her class has a crush on her. She will publicly humiliate him and put him down, but secretly embark on a long 'what if' journey in her mind. Eventually, she'll have a crush on him too and feel embarrassed about it.

Dating for the purpose of getting to know someone just as friends has died out. A pair getting to know each other will be pressured to 'go out' within weeks of starting to talk to each other. This wouldn't be so bad if 'going out' was just a guy and girl getting to know each other and sharing minimal psychical contact. But the thing is, going out isn't really going out. No, these days going out is like a trial marriage. The 14 year old couple will be acting like their married even though they've only known each other for a fortnight.

And it was all because all her friends were be like "Why won't he just ask you out already"?!

So there was a heap of pressure on the guy to 'pop the question'. He finally asks her...
"WOOHOO! They're boyfriend and girlfriend"! all her friends will squeal.
Wait, correction. Replace that 'woohoo' with 'EEEEEEEE!' and you will have a more accurate impression of the squealing teenage girls.

The 'getting to know you process' is ignored and the couple (who only just started talking two weeks ago) are now kissing (and doing so much more behind closed doors) and posting 'I luv you' with lots of kisses and hugs on their Facebook page.

Yuck yuck yuck. High school love is pathetic.

Have you ever....?

Have you ever heard someone exlaim 'wow' from a toilet?

I have.

It was because they were sitting in the dark and the light suddenly flashed on after having been busted for a week.

Have you ever sat on the side of a road with a box on your head?

I have.

It was because I live somewhere where there is no phone service and I desperatley wanted to text someone and I discovered that the only place in 10 kilometres where service can be found is in a certain spot across the road from my house. The box was to prevent drivers from recognising me (I don't have any neighbours). Hey, I live out in the country, I can get away with these things.

Have you ever not shut a window for fear that when you reached out something from the depths of darkness outside would attack your arm?

I have.

Have you ever been infamous for repetively doing embarrassing head bangers at a dance?

I have.

I was 13, I didn't know how to dance. Whenever I flicked my head back and forward my friends would make a swift exist from the dance floor, yet I kept doing it. Yet another one of those things that leaves me thinking I was a seriously strange person a few years back am so lucky to have friends who still love me regardless of the many embarassments I have subjected them to.


Have you ever looked at your drafts and found a really weird post that you wrote ages ago then decided to post it despite having a funny feeling that it's not the best idea?

I just did.

'I could die happy if I could just...'!

Everyone has that one thing that they claim if they completed or acquired or experienced, they would be able to die a happy man/woman.

What if your life aspiration was meet Michael Jackson then he died? Would you then die miserably because you didn't get to meet the 'Pop sensation'?

What if you just wanted a Twinkie and you lived in Australia so it wasn't possible to acquire a Twinky unless you ordered it online? I'm one of those people, ever since seeing Zombie land I have really wanted to try a Twinky. But I wouldn't go as far as saying 'I would kill for a Twinky'. I mean, maybe I'd kill a few zombies for one because they are already dead, so they don't really count but they also don't exist.

If I were in an American supermarket and there was one box of Twinkies on the shelf and the other person had took it, I would leave them to.
Except, maybe if they appeared to be a kind, approachable person, I would ask them super nicely if they would consider...hang on. Do Twinkies come in boxes or are they sold individually?
CAN AN AMERICAN (OR SOMEONE WHO KNOWS) PLEASE TELL ME!?

Oh gosh, I just had an incredible idea.
If you live somewhere where you have access to Twinkies, and you are a really really kind person with a huge heart who would consider sending me a Twinkie in the mail, could you please contact me? (I will pay you).


'I could die happy if I could just get through this afternoon without hearing one single mentioning of Osama'.

So the person whom said this wouldn't mind carking it that evening as long as they hadn't heard someone say Osama?

I know that these things are not meant to be taken literally but honestly, it irritates me to hear such utter nonsense.
It makes me feel like confronting them in a sarcastic tone.  Note; I could have just said that I feel like ripping their throat out but I didn't because I'm not obliged to say anything I wouldn't seriously consider doing. Ripping someones throat out would be gory, disgusting, immoral, and MURDER. Not to mention that it'd be terrible to clean up.

I think people should say what they mean and mean what they say.

Cinemas

Going to the Cinemas can be a great escape from life. You pay to sit there, in a dark air-conditioned room in front of a huge screen and watch a movie. As soon as you sit down, all the realities of your life evade your thoughts and for 2 hours, you are a different person. You aren't thinking about your life problems anymore, you are in the movie.

The beauty of movie's is that, it's not real life, they're just actors. Yet these actors can evoke so many emotions in us.
Empathy, happiness, sadness, wonder, suspense, disgust, confusion, excitement, fear, and so much else.

If you're going through a tough time, watch a horror movie. The realisation of how blessed you are to have all 20 of your digits, not be possessed by some demon and not have a dead baby sitter in your closet will give you a much more optimistic outlook on life!

If you just had a really difficult break up from a serious relationship, watch a romance. All the kissing and love will help you to relive the romantic moments of your dead relationship and make you feel so much better!

Movies have a different impact on each person depending on their memories, experiences, values, personality and where they are in life. With so many movies out their, there is something for everyone. And what better way to enjoy whatever type of movie it is that you like then to see it in a cinema?

Some may argue that they can get a experience just as good in their own home or that it's highly over-priced, but I'm saying that it is entirely worth it. If people went to the cinema's at least once a month the percentage of stress would decrease a little, and people would be happier.

I don't know if a study has been done on this, I don't have any proof, but this is just my idea, and I bet you one hundred horses (let's pretend just for the purpose of this statement that we're all Indians and horses are our currency, and that I have one hundred horses) that I am right.

Cinemas make people happy. :)

I could blog about...

I could blog about how I have missed a substantial amount of days of school due to flooding...


I could blog about how all these global disasters are making me more grateful for what I have...


I could blog about  how much different this year is to what I expected it to be...


I could blog the idiosyncrasies of my family...


I could blog about how sad it is that people are shallow enough to ostracise a person for their different looks, beliefs, behaviour or race...


I could blog about how I am amused by over-sharers (people who constantly tell you more then you need to/want to know)...


I could blog about how it amazes me that I have never heard my parent's complain about the Internet bill...


I could blog about how I immediately assume any noises outside at night time to be axe murderers or mad gunmen...


I could blog about how I made a list of things that I could make a blog about but didn't blog about any of them because I didn't feel like committing myself to a structured post and ended up making a some what structured blog about all the potential topics for blogs but ended up sharing an awesome energetic, danceable song....

Man's best invention

Man's best invention, this bubbly concoction
A few times too many, now its an addiction
You just need a little to talk to that girl
Not too much or it'll make you hurl
Easy, easy, you still want to be able to walk
Is it just you, or are people starting to gawk?
Have they never seen you this way before?
Now you're basking in it, confidence galore!
"Hey, that's a nice rack you have there".
You get a left hook to the nose, but you don't care.
The music gets too loud, and you start to sweat
Tonight a bloody nose is all your going to get
Where did that llama come from?
Why is this guy calling you Tom?
It all becomes too much, you have to leave this bar.
You need to find your shirt so you can get to your car
The room is shaking side to side, you can't find it anywhere.
Screw the shirt, all it did was make people stare.
Out on the street, lights flash, red, blue and white.
"Good Evening Officer, isn't it a lovely night?"

My hate for horror movies

Hate is a strong word. A word that I never use against people. However there is a certain movie genre that I can hate without a trace of guilt.
Horror movies.

A form of entertainment that I absolutely detest.

To the people who are responsible for making horror movies (although I doubt any such people would be reading this).

SHAME ON YOU.

You have desensitised people to things that were once only seen in nightmares.

Crazy-ass Cyclone

 Yasi:

A tropical cyclone that crossed the East coast of North Queensland in the early hours of the morning on the 3rd of February 2011 (just over a week ago).

It was a category 5 cyclone with wind speeds of 295 kilometres an hour.

It was the first cyclone in Australian history to not lose any of its ferocity upon crossing the coast.

It had a 500km wide storm front.

I live just over 100km away from where the centre of the storm past.

I live in the district that was hit, the region that was the most devastated by the disaster.

The deadly cyclone only proved deadly to a number of people which you can count on one hand. Despite the low death toll the fierce tropical storm has still caused severe damage to property that has sabotaged lives and turned everything into pandemonium.

As a fore-word to the next paragraph to prevent the confusion that would inevitably ensue if I didn't provide you with this vital piece of information; I am currently on a computer in my school library.

I have been without electricity for a week now and it is expected that the power lines will not be prepared for at least one month, I've heard that power won't be restored for nine weeks but I am dearly hoping that this is just a miscalculation.

We were without a phone for five days, we live out of mobile range so using our mobiles was not an option.

"I went and saw the Smith's this morning. They've lost the roof off their house, everything is gone"
"Oh my, I'd heard about the Harpers and the Forgans but not them. Where are they staying"?
"They're at the neighbours house. The place is bloody packed and they've run out of bread and milk".
"Ooh, I've got a few litres of Long Life milk. I'll take it over to them soon".

Without the phones it was conversations like these that kept us informed of what was going on and how other people were coping.

Life without electricity can be a fun experience if you're camping or if it's only for 3 days. At any point in time when you are shivering in the cold shower or cursing at the TV, computer, light, fan, air-conditioning, or any other electrical appliance that people usually use to make life more comfortable; you can stop and remind yourself that many third world countries are without any of these luxuries and that 300 years ago electricity was non-existent.

But after a week...

Your optimistic "If-other-people-live-like-this-then-I-can-too" attitude wears thin.

However even without electricity I certainly haven't been lacking things to do. Half the roof was torn off my Dad's shed. As owner of his own windscreen and panel beating business, Dad had some important things in that shed. He had a filing cabinet of important paper work, windscreens and a shelf full of hundreds of dollars worth of paint and car parts as well as other vital business equipment.

It has been a whole family effort for the past week to clean up. We have pulled together and been more patient and co-operative then ever before. I love how disasters make people pull together.

Upon seeing the damage to his shed it would have been easy and entirely understandable for Dad to lose it. To yell and scream, or cry, or smash things or lock himself in his room, but he did none of these things. Dad has been very strong through out the whole clean up, maintaining achievable goals everyday to make getting through easier. He holds a good spirit and is pushing forward despite knowing so little about what is going to happen next. He was faced with the unexpected (he never imagined that the roof would come off), yet he is overcoming it with such optimism and perseverance that it is impossible to watch him and not question your own integrity.

Our flattened sugar cane farm

Reading through old diaries... :O

10th of Decemeber, 2005
I am so excited that I am in grade 7 next year! Next year I'll be the oldest student in the school by two weeks and I'll be a senior leader!

This is an old diary entry of mine that I came across today. It is a bit funny to read 6 years later. I am a senior in highschool this year (grade 12). I go back after 2 months of summer holidays on Tuesday and I can tell you I don't quite have as much enthusiasm...

I Got The Magic In Me

I'm not even marginally magic, never done anything magic in my life, so that title is mis-informing. I just used it 'coz that song is in my head.

 Lovely things that I done to my family as a child:   

• Put hand soap in my parents toothpaste then hid behind a cupboard and laughed hysterically when bubbles came out of their mouth.
• Poured bleach on my baby brothers head when I was 3.
• Gave my brother a hair cut on several occasions.
• Pushed my little sister over when she was a toddler, ran to the opposite side of the room, then pretended to rush to her aid when my parents came in the room and told them that she had fallen over. This worked fine until the day she learnt to talk. Her first words were "she pushed me"!
• Took all my brothers clothes off him and threw them up a tree then locked him out of the house 

Confession:  

Sometimes when I'm in peoples' bathrooms, I smell their perfumes. Terrible, I know. It's something I'm trying to stop.

   

JUST KIDDING!

   

What kind of confession would that be?

  

Here's a real confession:  

I don't talk much sometimes because my head hurts when I talk too much, not 'coz I don't have anything to say or because I'm shy. 

Also, 

I've observed that in a lot of conversations, the people who talk a lot are heard but not really listened to. Your more likely to pay attention when a quiet person talks because its not often that you actually get an idea of what it going on in their head. I want to be listened to, not just heard. If you talk a lot of rubbish all the time then soon people will stop listening to you and just hear you or they may even block out your voice entirely and it will just become a background noise to their thoughts. 

How Do You Express Your Anger?  

1. Crying  

2 Sarcasm  

3. Yelling  

4. Silence  

5. Pretend that nothing is wrong  

6. Talk about him/her to other people  

7. Calmly talk directly to him/her  

8. Physically leave the room.

  

When I am angry I will either go silent, talk directly to the person or use nasty sarcasm.

   

What do you do when you are angry with someone?

   

I used to have a fear of bananas. I was terrified of them. I knew that they could not hurt me but simply seeing a banana used to reduce me to tears.

What's in the box?

With the title that I have you may find yourself vaguely recollecting a song from a children's TV show that you used to watch...
it depends on how old you are I guess and whether or not its just me.
But if it is just me, it doesn't matter because that's not what this post is about anyway.
This post is about my findings...in a box.
So indeed, you will read about my discovery of what's in the box. ;)

I found a box full of my parents old things that they had forgotten about.

In the box was:

• All of my mum's high school report cards! Now I have seen her results and all I will say is, giving her my report card will no longer be so painful.
• Diaries, lots of diaries from when mum was a teenager and several diaries of dad's. (I didn't read any of them because as much as I'd love read about all the stupid stuff that they done when they were young, they deserve to have there privacy and dignity maintained).
• A koala stamp...it still works, prints a cute little green koala on the paper.
• Lots of cards from their birthdays, Christmas, engagement, wedding and the birth of their first child (ME!).
• Their school photos.
• Lots of my mum's assignments from a childcare TAFE course that she done when she was 19.
• The little plastic band that was clipped onto my ankle shortly after my dramatic loud entrance into the world.
• Tickets from the river cruise that they went on on their honeymoon.
• and a few other things.

When Mum wrote in her diary as a 14 year old girl, she never imagined that her 16 year old daughter would find it 26 years later.

I should write a note in my diary next time I'm writing saying 'My future daughter; don't snoop in your mother's diary! And don't get any ideas from what you've read'.

My daughter would do well to not do anything that I've done. :P
 Except she's allowed facebook. As much it corrupts children, hinders their capacity to achieve, wastes time, develops poor communication skills and many other evil things that my mum will passionately inform you of, it has connected me with the people I love, and for that I am extremely grateful. So I will overlook all its evil traits, and allow my daughter to use it under the condition that she has me as a facebook friend.

Technology has created a society that leaves much to desire, but like my mum sometimes says; 'Unless you are willing to take over, keep your mouth shut'.

Cravings (not the sort that pregnant women get)

Two things that I often crave are hugs and D&Ms (deep and meaningful conversations). Neither of these things can be accessed instantly or easily. Both of these things are experiences that I value for their flawlessness, and there ability to make me feel so at peace. However, certain conditions must be in place for these moments to be perfect. A hug has to be at the right time with the right person. You can't just hug a stranger or a colleague.

I love those hugs where you feel enveloped by the persons arms, and you feel so safe. You can fall asleep on your feet, you feel so at peace and the moment it just, perfect.

A D&M is like an exotic bird that occasionally sashays into the conversation amazon. This bird is sought after by many (mostly emotion filled teenage girls), but can only be truly captured by people with the right ingredients.

Ingredients for a D&M:

-2 or more people (no more than 5) whom you trust and are comfortable with.

- a comfy private setting with no distractions (TV, loud music, etc)

- 20mins- several hours. (There's no telling how long it can go for).

- and for best results, a small amount of lighting.
Great scenes for D&Ms are by camp fires, in rooms with the dim lighting, or outside at night. Bright lights tend to scare them away.

A D&M can only be achieved when all these ingredients are in place, but these ingredients must be put together unintentionally. You can't plan a really effective D&M, they just happen.

And so my dear readers, I would like to know what YOU often crave. :)